Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Is this Karma because I already said I was sorry!

Wow.  I've often heard the adage that a parent's true revenge comes when their child has a child.  Yikes.  It's true.  My seven year old has been in some sort of funk, mood, stage that seems to get better only to yell "Gotcha!" and attack with more force than before.
Don't get me wrong, I love my daughter and know that this too shall pass and there may even be a time when I will mourn it's passing.  Right now though,  I'm totally feeling the "what goes around comes around" saying.
I was a difficult child.  A strong-willed child - if you like.  My husband has been branded with similar descriptions.  My daughter has combined the attribute from me with that from her father, making her "iron-willed."  Throw in the female component and you have quite a contender.  We've witnessed broadway quality crying episodes, heard the dreaded "you're the worst ____ in the world and I hate you", have had doors slammed, etc.  Somehow, this was much easier to handle than the lying that has cropped up as of late.
She has developed a pretty incredible ability to lie.  Seriously, we have no idea it is happening at the time.  Sometimes, she is so good that she even fools herself into believing.   She's also becoming quite skilled at rewording when caught. "what i really meant was..."
In any case, it has caused me to pause and recall my own childhood.  I was quite the drama queen at times growing up and was generally wordy as well.  Though I don't explicitly remember the lying, it is possible that over the years I have convinced myself of whatever "truths" I had proclaimed.  In the end, however, I think I turned out rather well-balanced with a healthy imagination.
And so to those parents who have admonished our parenting skills - or lack thereof- for having raised a stubborn, lying child, I say "Bah! Try taking your worst attribute, magnify it in a emotional seven year old and then come talk to me."
We have not raised her to believe that tantrums and lying are permissible, though neither did my parents raise me in that manner.  Does this mean it's genetic?  Perhaps it would be better to say that my own version of Karma is manifesting itself in our life right now.

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